I miss you more

…because moving every year means leaving a lot behind…

I miss you  more than…

children miss Christmas.

crackers miss salt.

Republicans miss Reagan.

doctors miss stethoscopes.

white people miss dancing arrhythmically.

dairy products miss thighs.

Fibonacci misses spirals.

steroids miss shrunken testicles.

fatties miss vertical stripes.

hipsters miss irony.

cancers miss mitosis.

Long Island housewives miss Ice Tea.

potheads miss Doritos.

diamonds miss blood.

tighty whities miss buttcracks.

Capitalists miss oppressing the working class.

college students miss thinking they’re adults.

writers miss references to alcohol.

America misses the good ol’ days.

sanity misses Glenn Beck.

Jesus misses carpentry.

music videos miss the 80s.

Skinemax misses there not being an internet.

platypuses miss evolving.

religions miss the dark ages.

vampires miss SPF 100.

day misses night.

the summer misses the sun.

jokes miss being run into the ground.

4 thoughts on “I miss you more

  1. my favs were “potheads miss doritos” (mainly because it reminds me of dorito man from the ozark trip . . . had you gone by that time? i think so) and the jesus misses carpentry . . . because it makes carpentry seem more fun than martyrdom . . . that could be a good advertisement for going into carpentry . . . it’s more fun than martyrdom.
    anyway . . . this actually makes me think how much i miss writing . . .

    i don’t know what the hell has happened to my punctuation . . .

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