…because moving every year means leaving a lot behind…
I miss you more than…
children miss Christmas.
crackers miss salt.
Republicans miss Reagan.
doctors miss stethoscopes.
white people miss dancing arrhythmically.
dairy products miss thighs.
Fibonacci misses spirals.
steroids miss shrunken testicles.
fatties miss vertical stripes.
hipsters miss irony.
cancers miss mitosis.
Long Island housewives miss Ice Tea.
potheads miss Doritos.
diamonds miss blood.
tighty whities miss buttcracks.
Capitalists miss oppressing the working class.
college students miss thinking they’re adults.
writers miss references to alcohol.
America misses the good ol’ days.
sanity misses Glenn Beck.
Jesus misses carpentry.
music videos miss the 80s.
Skinemax misses there not being an internet.
platypuses miss evolving.
religions miss the dark ages.
vampires miss SPF 100.
day misses night.
the summer misses the sun.
jokes miss being run into the ground.